“Like something out of a Romanian disco in 1986. Fkn awful.”

This is what happens when you don’t educate the next generation about the horrors of The Ting Tings.”

“If this is the future of Australian live music…stick a fucking fork in it. Game over man…game over.”

A selection of comments on a video, posted in July, of Aussie supergroup Confidence Man performing at Splendour in the Grass festival after radio station Triple J labelled them the country’s most exciting live act.

Nine months on, Confidence Man release their debut album on Friday the 13th, making opening track Try Your Luck quite an apt title. We’re immediately thrown into the deep end of leading lady Janet Planet’s sassy attitude as she proclaims; “I must confess/I’ve been sleeping with your ex ‘cause I heard he was the best/I must confess/I never would have guessed he would get so obsessed.”

It’s clear from the off that that Confidence Man are here for a good time, lyrically it’s not going to be winning any Ivor Novellos, but the ever-changing beats of Reggie Goodchild provide the perfect excuse to dance like you would in your kitchen with nobody watching.

Don’t You Know I’m In A Band introduces us to the Right Said Fred tonality of Sugar Bones’ vocals before lead single Boyfriend (Repeat), the subject of the ire of those keyboard warriors above, gets the party well and truly started. “He always dines in and he never eats out/If he’s the one for me, then I’d rather go without.” Don’t mess with Janet.

The intensity of ‘Confident Music For Confident People’ perfectly replicates the live experience that is a Confidence Man show, but, for some, it may prove a bit too frantic. However, the inclusion of Out The Window, a “slow burner” if you will, shows that the band do have intentions of changing things up every so often. In a recent interview with GoldenPlec, they told us that this song was a sign of how they expect their next record to go, a direction we certainly approve of.

In keeping with the comparisons with the band’s live shows, in which Sugar and Janet take occasional breaks to catch their breath, there are two instrumental tracks on the record, which focus on the lesser-seen skills of Goodchild on synth and Clarence McGuffie on drums. Let Me Catch My Breath in particular, would belong in any German warehouse nightclub.

All The Way and Fascination further solidify the limb-flailing dance aesthetic but it’s C O O L Party that best represents what this album is all about as Janet speak-sings over a funky bassline. So I take off my jacket and I just keep dancing/Actually, everyone’s dancing, it’s the party of the year”. This album is, without doubt, the party of 2018.

‘Confident Music For Confident People’ has the potential to be 2018’s most polarising album. Its near-incessant, sugary-sweet party attitude combined with its salty, tongue-in-cheek, zero-fucks-given lyrics are not for everyone, and result in an album that’s the musical equivalent of vegemite.

Luckily, I love vegemite.